After 7 years of homeschooling, I’ve realized something: most of our hard homeschool days have to do with me. True story. I hate to admit it, but it’s the honest truth. Most of my hard homeschool days are all about what’s going on with me. 

Sure, there are lots of days where the kids are complaining, constantly bickering, and generally acting like Oscar the Grouch. I know that doesn’t make for a particularly amazing day.

There’s nothing like walking down the stairs in the morning to be greeted by complaints about school assignments, who’s annoying whom and RED ALERT: there’s nothing to eat for breakfast!

These are typical kid complaints and nothing really astonishing. On most days, I can handle those complaints pretty well.

I can put on my superhero cape and list at least five things these children can eat for breakfast.

Don’t like your school assignments for the day? Great! Too bad! (Okay, I’m not always that heartless). 

But for real, most days, I can handle these situations.

Hard Homeschool Day Scenario

Imagine with me, however, a night of poor sleep. Weird dreams. Tossing and turning. Husband snoring, etc.

Maybe it hasn’t even been just one night, but a couple of nights. As a result, I’m feeling tired, irritated, and maybe wondering if there’s something wrong with me, right? 

Or how about this scenario: It’s the middle of winter. The world is in the middle of a pandemic. Your field trip options have become severely limited.

You haven’t seen your friends face-to-face in ages, and you’re just really tired of the whole thing. You’re wondering how long life will go on like this?

Now imagine you have PMS, an argument with a spouse, and maybe a broken down appliance on top of poor sleep and living in the middle of a pandemic.

Sigh…

You’re practically in tears before your feet hit the floor.

Then the kids bombard you with complaints about food, pestering and school assignments, and you think you just might flip your lid.

Maybe you do.

Within minutes, you’re flooded with self-negating thoughts, tears, and doubt.

How will you make it through this day? 

It doesn’t take long to feel like a tired, hopeless failure who was kidding herself trying to pull off homeschooling. 

Take heart, mama!

You have just joined the club of Moms Who Have Bad Homeschooling Days. You probably didn’t even know that it’s a club, but it is. Or, at least it should be formally organized, so that we can all commiserate together as needed.

Everyone Has Hard Homeschooling Days

Before you throw in the towel, cancel Christmas or call the whole thing off, I want you to know that this too shall pass.

You CAN salvage the day, and you WILL get through it.

I’ve had a lot of these days. Too many to count.

I have struggled with not feeling well, being tired, burnt out and stressed out while trying to homeschool.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t very equipped to handle those days. I resigned myself to just try to get by until my spouse came home from work, or the kids went to bed. In the meantime, I would feel miserable, discouraged, and defeated. 

If only I could go back and talk to my past self. Give me the pep talk and perspective I better understand now. I would encourage me to be a little more gracious with myself, and give myself permission to take it easy those days.

Of course, I can’t go back to the past, but I can share with you what I’ve learned over the years. I want to encourage and equip you to handle those days with confidence and TRUTH. 

What You Really Need to Know About Hard Homeschool Days

I believe that the key to a hard homeschool day is being able to take a moment for myself to recognize a few KEY things:

• how I am feeling
• why I am feeling that way

Then, I can create a game plan.

If the issues I normally handle like a superhero are suddenly overwhelming and highly irritating, that’s the first clue that something is amiss with me.

I understand.

A broken appliance might not be fixed overnight. A disagreement with a spouse might take days to resolve.

However, if you can recognize:

• what’s going on internally
• give yourself some grace and,
• have practical action steps in your back pocket

you can make it through the day beyond just surviving.

5 Helpful Tips for Hard Homeschool Days

1-Share Your Hard Homeschool Day With a Friend 

Do you have a friend that can help carry your burdens? A trustworthy, kindred spirit with whom you can share your struggles?

Phone, text, or message your person on these days. Just having someone that will listen, empathize and encourage you is so life-giving. 

My mom has been a lifeline for me numerous times, and if I can’t reach her, I have back-ups and reinforcements. Do not struggle alone.

So many times, just this one act of reaching out to my community has been enough to turn my day around, refresh my perspective, and give me the strength to carry on.

2-Grab Some Time Alone

I’m an introverted mom, so while I enjoy learning and teaching alongside my kids, I struggle being with them All.Day.Long.

I refuel in my alone time. This is where I take time to think, feel and talk to Jesus. Especially on hard days.

I know it’s difficult to find alone time as a mom with babies, toddlers or young children that need supervised. Grabbing alone time is pretty easy for me now, but it didn’t feel that way a few years ago.

I understand if this feels unrealistic to you. Be creative, though, and figure out how you can manage to pull off just 15-30 minutes of alone time, even if you have little ones.

A small amount of time can sometimes be just enough for you to regroup, refocus, and move forward.

Practical idea: put the kids in strollers armed with plenty of snacks. Everyone’s getting some fresh air and a change of pace, they’re occupied and content. Then you have some time to be alone with your thoughts and prayers. This can also be the perfect time to contact a support person!

With older kids, you can pop in a movie, which grants you at least an hour for some much needed homeschool mom self-care.

3-Remember the Wins In Your Homeschool

Take time to celebrate what’s going well in your homeschool. What challenges have you overcome? Where do you see growth in your children? Recall moments when you observed your children’s character shining through.

Positive growth is happening. Learning is happening. Your children are being shaped and molded under your life-giving, sacrificial love.

This is no small task and it’s worthy of celebration.

4-Practice Gratitude

When I’m having a hard day, I don’t feel like being grateful. Sometimes what I want most is to wallow in my struggles, which is the antithesis of what my heart most needs. 

Gratitude can change our thinking and perspective. Pick up a pen and journal and spend a couple minutes listing all the gifts that come to mind.

Food in the fridge.

A child that’s feeling better.

The sun shining.

A cup of warm coffee.

A favorite, new sweater to wear.

An encouraging text from a friend.

Turning gratitude into a daily habit is life-giving for me, and a discipline worth engaging in daily, not just on the hard days.

5-Ditch Your Homeschool Schedule and Do Something Fun

Of all the above, this one might be hardest to embrace. It sounds easy and fun, but we homeschoolers sure can struggle with schedules. 

What if we fall behind in math?

We only have two weeks left to memorize all 50 states and capitals.

If we don’t have school today, the calendar I’ve written out for the month will be off! 

Sound familiar? 

I have learned that trudging through a hard day with a bad attitude often hurts my relationship with my children. Learning loses its beauty. The kids bicker more. It’s often just plain ugly.

You don’t have to ditch the entire day. Maybe all you keep on the schedule are some read-alouds or math. You can allow the kids to decide what things from the schedule get completed, and after that you head to the park.

Think out-of-the-box here. 

Moving my entire homeschool outside for the day is highly refreshing for me when the weather permits. I’ll work one-on-one with each child while the others play.

Moreover, I feel like we’re still accomplishing some work, while getting vitamin D and fresh air. The sun automatically lifts my mood.

Maybe you even say yes to ice cream before lunch. Best mom ever! 

There are really many possibilities here that will allow you gracious space in the day. A homeschool day can still be full of learning, even if the schedule is only:

• a movie or documentary (here’s a great list)
• some games
• a walk outside
• a read-aloud

How about a trip to the zoo, or a meet-up with friends at the park (gym class!)? 

The Truth About Hard Homeschool Days

Honestly, it’s often days like these that give me pause to appreciate and enjoy my kids. They love when I sit with them on the couch and watch a movie. They love heading to the park to play.

I’m the one who has to allow myself the freedom to let things go.

When I do, and my little one curls up in my lap, plasters me with kisses, and smiles abound on faces, my empty bucket slowly fills.

I see my overabundant blessings, and the world doesn’t feel quite as wrong.

Be Encouraged Homeschool Mom

You CAN handle the hard homeschool days.

Just think of other life challenges you’ve tackled and conquered!

It won’t feel easy at the time, but armed with the options above, you will be able to craft hard homeschool days into something beautiful.

They just might end up as favorite memories of the entire school year!

A Special Word to Struggling Moms

If you find that your hard homeschool days are every day, or happening more than you care to count, I strongly encourage you to seek out someone that can help you problem solve: a veteran homeschool mom, a trusted friend or even a counselor.

The above information is written from the perspective of having a hard homeschool day here and there.

If those days are now the norm, you’re likely needing more help than just a one-day break in routine can provide.

That is okay.

We’re all on a journey as moms and homeschoolers, and our needs vary in different life seasons.

The important thing is that you don’t struggle alone and don’t lose heart!  

Find the help you need to make positive changes that will help you get your homeschool back on track. You can do this!